petrichorianpowers:

saevuswinds:

thegailygrind:

Cool Jesus at Chicago pride

I’m still laughing at that police officer he’s all like, “God bless you go Jesus”

SO ACCURATE TOO.

prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.
Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.
Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.
The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.
I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere - and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.
The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.
So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.
Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.
Fucking wasps.

prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.

Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.

Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.

The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.

I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere - and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.

The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.

So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.

Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.

Fucking wasps.

tadpole-in-a-tuxedo:

DEAR SWEET GOD

I WAS TRYING TO EDIT THIS GIF:

image

AND THIS MONSTROSITY HAPPENED

image

GOD ON HIGH HEAR MY PRAYER

heliolisk:

trying to take a picture with your friends with a phone that doesnt have a front camera
image

jollyidiot:

I have reblogged this at least a thousand times

jollyidiot:

I have reblogged this at least a thousand times

outrunmyself:

ultrafacts:

panichristie:

erisdogwood:

ultrafacts:

chocolatesprinklesroyale:

ultrafacts:

Source More Facts

Guards: Oh no. Wait. Stop. No. Don’t steal those. Get back here, you criminal. (Pfft! Can’t believe they’re falling for it!)

I read that in a sarcastic voice





stop

why is this so funny?

outrunmyself:

ultrafacts:

panichristie:

erisdogwood:

ultrafacts:

chocolatesprinklesroyale:

ultrafacts:

Source More Facts

Guards: Oh no. Wait. Stop. No. Don’t steal those. Get back here, you criminal. (Pfft! Can’t believe they’re falling for it!)

I read that in a sarcastic voice

image

stop

why is this so funny?

No one understands why I find it so funny that my foot doctor is named Dr. Palmar.

slythergin:

slytherin-elsa:

My mom got me this shiRT AND I AM LAUGHING SO HARD SHE DOESNT EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT SHES DONE SHE DOESNT GET THE IRONY IN THIS I AM A CLOSETED LESBIAN THIS IS COMEDY GOLD I MIGHT COME OUT TO HER OVER THIS FUCKING SHIRT JUST TO EXPLAIN WHY I CANT STOP LAUGHING

UPDATE: When I told her I’m gay she crossed her arms and said in a really pissed off voice “Are you telling me I spent $15 on that shirt for nothing??”

slythergin:

slytherin-elsa:

My mom got me this shiRT AND I AM LAUGHING SO HARD SHE DOESNT EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT SHES DONE SHE DOESNT GET THE IRONY IN THIS I AM A CLOSETED LESBIAN THIS IS COMEDY GOLD I MIGHT COME OUT TO HER OVER THIS FUCKING SHIRT JUST TO EXPLAIN WHY I CANT STOP LAUGHING

UPDATE: When I told her I’m gay she crossed her arms and said in a really pissed off voice “Are you telling me I spent $15 on that shirt for nothing??”

luminightss:

scaredatbest:

Holy FUCK

That took an unexpected turn

elleodian:

Hi everyone! I recently posted a Side-Split, and was asked how to enter the unusual pose. It’s normally done standing up, so the mat version is tricky to envision at first. So, here’s a photo tutorial :) Stay safe and enjoy this deep shoulder, hamstrings, and hip-opening stretch. I’ve seen a variation that includes binding your hands behind, just like Bird of Paradise — go as far as you feel confident and listen to your body xx

fauxboy:

starshinethecat1:

xxgoldie12xx:

the-winchesters-in-221b:

2ollux-2hip2-2tuff:

davespritedave:

hoechlolly:

tehwhovianhufflepuff:

imagine-tenthousand:


mockinggrass:


Go big or go home 


So I tried to recreate this, because I knew the responses would be different, and consequently realized that it’s either extremely old or faked, as Cleverbot auto-capitalizes and auto-punctuates your sentences for you if you do not. Oh well.
In light of that fact, here’s my go at cybersexing Cleverbot.



So I decided to try it

alrighty, let’s go one more step





i’M ACTUALLY CRYING.

THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY


Story of my life


that’s a first.

I LAUGHED HARDER THEN I HOULD HAVE AND I WAS IN PUBLIC

I wasn’t gonna reblog this but I lost it at the last one

fauxboy:

starshinethecat1:

xxgoldie12xx:

the-winchesters-in-221b:

2ollux-2hip2-2tuff:

davespritedave:

hoechlolly:

tehwhovianhufflepuff:

imagine-tenthousand:

mockinggrass:

Go big or go home 

So I tried to recreate this, because I knew the responses would be different, and consequently realized that it’s either extremely old or faked, as Cleverbot auto-capitalizes and auto-punctuates your sentences for you if you do not. Oh well.

In light of that fact, here’s my go at cybersexing Cleverbot.

image

So I decided to try it

image

alrighty, let’s go one more step

image

image

image

i’M ACTUALLY CRYING.

image

THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY

image

Story of my life

image

that’s a first.

I LAUGHED HARDER THEN I HOULD HAVE AND I WAS IN PUBLIC

I wasn’t gonna reblog this but I lost it at the last one

monetizeyourcat:

magicpottybaby:

sizvideos:

TL;DR : Watch this incredible story in video

holy fuck! so how did the penguins taste?????

this is the cutest video in the entire world. this seal is just so afraid for this dumb weird baby she thinks she’s found out in the ocean. have a bird. have another bird. no, see, eat the bird! the bird is food! why won’t this stupid baby eat. open your mouth you idiot baby i will feed you bird if it’s the last thing i do

cr00kedfingers:

ramones365:

what are cats even trying to do

I laughed at this for far too long.

thatfunnyblog:

Words. To. Live. By.

thatfunnyblog:

Words. To. Live. By.